Saturday, March 18, 2017

Illinois lawmakers designate October Zombie Preparedness Month

It was the first rate, Chicago Police website Second City Cop that noticed “Something is Missing,” apart from the obvious respect of Illinois lawmakers for the intellect of their constituents. Ed.
Says Second City Cop:
 No idea how we missed this one back in February - no budget for two years, but the assholes in Springfield have time for this:
  • Illinois lawmakers are encouraging the state to be undead-ready by passing a resolution declaring October to be "Zombie Preparedness Month."

    The state House voted Thursday to approve House Resolution 0030, which calls for October to be declared "Zombie Preparedness Month" as a bid to encourage the state's residents to be prepared for more realistic natural disasters. 

    "If the citizens of Illinois are prepared for zombies, than they are prepared for any natural disaster; while a Zombie Apocalypse may never happen, the preparation for such an event is the same as for any natural disaster," the resolution reads.
  • Citizens should have supplies on hand, which may include, water, food, medications, tools, electronics, sanitation and hygiene, clothing and bedding, important documents and first aid...
You know what Illinois lawmakers seem to have left out?
  • Weapons. And ammo.
If you don't have a gun and at least a few thousand rounds for that gun, you are going to die in any sort of zombie apocalypse. And depending on where you live in Chicago, Cook County, Illinois, the same is going to happen if there's any sort of natural disaster that interrupts power and commerce for an extended period of time - say one week, two tops.  

Isn’t it nice that the Illinois State Legislature has time to instruct citizens on the proper method of preparing for a Zombie attack! (Of course, as SCC points out, weapons and ammo are not considered necessary supplies for any sort of natural disaster—zombies included. Far too politically incorrect, especially in Illinois.)

Not exactly hard to believe, is it? After all, the American people are treated like abject morons by everyone from movie makers to purveyors of news, sports, weather and current events. So why not by their elected officials as well!

And perhaps rightly so! For the dumbing down of society has become a vitally important feature in the left’s assault on individual liberty. Those of us who have attained Social Security age are hard pressed to believe that today’s kids could pass the High School courses we took 50 years ago. Shakespeare? Midsummer Night’s Dream? Not likely. Today’s NEA members are told to instruct the proper method of placing condoms on cucumbers and other really, really important stuff.

So by all means, lets treat the people of Illinois like the brainless oafs their elected officials hope they've become.  After all, these political constituents voted twice for Hussein and once for Hillary. How friggin' smart can they be!   Ed.

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